Live A Full Life!

My earliest memories are running wild and free in the African bush.... with plenty of mishaps, skinned knees, scrapped elbows, grazes and bruises. My mother always lamenting my ‘tom boyish’ ways as she cleaned and ‘doctored’ my cuts and scrapes. However, I have amazing, wonderful memories and now at forty, I have even more scars, stretch marks, laugh lines and even some wrinkles.... everyone a memory and testament to the full life I have lived so far... and I hope with many more laugh lines and even wrinkles still to come. *Grin*

There was a time when I hated the scars on my face from a teenage accident with my brother’s bicycle, covering my face with make-up that I hated wearing, only ever wearing dresses and shirts with sleeves to hide the ugly scar on my shoulder, and long shorts in hot weather to hide the scars and discolouration on my thigh from the same accident.

Fortunately, my perspective changed a number of years ago. I was facilitating a four day workshop for a group of women between the ages of about 26 and 38, with the exception of one woman who was in her early 60’s, although you would never have thought so. She looked remarkably young for her age, with clear, wrinkle free skin, and a toned, slim body to rival that of any model. Her hair was gorgeously styled, her make-up was perfect and she wore a designer outfit that cost more than.... well, probably my entire wardrobe. During the workshop she listened attentively, however, rarely made comments and chose to remain quiet in the discussions, so I was surprised when she asked if we could have a chat once everyone had left after the final day of the workshop.

During the course of the workshop I had shared some of my life experiences, some unpleasant, some normal everyday happenings... as well as some of the awesome, wonderful, life changing experiences I had enjoyed. So, when this woman sat down with me and said, “Mands, I envy you so much,” I was speechless. She continued to share some of what her life was all about, marriage for forty years to a man who saw her as little more than an adornment and hostess for his business functions, and children she had only surface relationships with even while she wanted more. Her days were filled with hours of pampering her body and ensuring that her looks remained as beautiful and youthful as possible, and even though she was involved with a number of charities her heart felt empty. “Mands, the worst of it, is that I am entirely responsible for the lack of any depth in my life. I chose my life, even as I allowed it to be the way it was and still is.” she said. “Never regret your scars, or even your wrinkles as they are the signs you have lived a full life with an open heart. You have deep loving relationships with your husband and children and you have embraced each of us on your workshop with openness and love. Mands, you have lived more in one year of your life, than I have lived in my entire life, because you are willing to open your heart and love, no matter the heartache and heartbreak you have experienced, and I was always too afraid to even try.” she said with tears flowing down her face.

I had no words of comfort or wisdom to give as I hugged her good-bye, as I simply felt overwhelmed by what she had said. I did however learn a valuable lesson from her sharing, and even though I had started to love and accept myself more, I now started to love and accept even my imperfections, my scars, stretch marks, laugh lines and even the few wrinkles that I have.... I stopped wearing the makeup I hated so much, and an amazing thing happened, the scars that I had seen so starkly on my face began to fade in just a short time, and now they are barely noticeable.

When you live a full life and embrace all it has to offer, when you have fun and try new things, you will probably stub a toe, miss a step and even fall, scrapping your knee or even scarring your face.... I have lost count of the amount of times I have fallen, sometimes even flat on my face, *Smile* some of my most embarrassing moments, *Grin* however, I have lived a full, happy life filled with loving relationships and I realise that I would rather have my scars, stretch marks, laugh lines and wrinkles than have missed a single moment of any of my experiences!

Live a Full Life!
Embrace life by living it to the fullest and have lots of fun.
Cry with all your heart when you need to, and Laugh out Loud as much and as often as you can, even as you create laugh lines and wrinkles, you will enjoy great moments and have wonderful memories!

Love and Laughter to You and Yours!
Mands

A Precious Human Life

Everyday
Think as you wake up
Today I am fortunate to have woken up
I am alive
I have a precious human life
I am not going to waste it
I am going to use
All my energies to develop myself
To expand my heart out to others
To achieve enlightenment for
The benefit of all beings
I am going to have kind
Thoughts towards others
I am not going to get angry
Or think badly about others
I am going to benefit others
As much as I can.

- His Holiness the XIVth Dalai Lama

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Spring Updates

'Mister, Why Are You So Wrinkled?'
An elderly man explains to a young boy that sometimes signs of aging
are actually signs of a life well-lived.

By Edward Fays

A little elementary school was set on a small parcel of land, complete with jungle gym and basketball hoop. From the school playground you could see the front porch of a nearby senior center. The kids were always too busy playing to pay any attention to the center, but many of the seniors delighted in watching the kids frolic in the schoolyard.

One day Ms. Valentine, the first-grade teacher, noticed the seniors watching the children and thought it would be a good idea to bring them together. So early one morning the following week, the children were escorted hand-in-hand out the door of their classroom, through the playground, beyond the school fence, and over to the senior center. The students were allowed to mingle if they liked, and some were introduced to residents of the center. Remmy Evans, an enterprising little boy, was strolling around as if he were sizing everyone up when he spotted an older gentleman outfitted in a checkered flannel shirt and sky-blue baseball cap sitting off in the corner. Their eyes met, and the man waved Remmy over. "Hello, I'm Mr. Royce," said the man, extending his hand as if they were about to engage in a business meeting.

Remmy observed Mr. Royce's hand curiously and said, "Excuse me, mister, but why are you so wrinkled?" Mr. Royce laughed heartily and said, "Now, that is a very good question. Would you really like to know?" "Sure," replied Remmy. "What's your name?" asked Mr. Royce.

Remmy hopped up on a chair and said, "My name is Remmy Theodore Evans. But most people just call me Remmy." "Well, Remmy, let me tell you the story about wrinkles. Most people think wrinkles are a sign of age, but they're really a sign of use. When you're wrinkled, like me, it means you have lived a full life. It means you have more memories than most people do. I'll show you what I mean. How many times has Santa Claus visited your house?"

Remmy scratched his head, and his eyes rolled back before he finally responded. "Well, I'm six, but I can only remember the last couple of years, and Santa Claus came those times." "So you know for sure that Santa Claus visited your house at least twice?" asked Mr. Royce.

"Yeah, that's right," replied Remmy. "Listen to this," announced Mr. Royce. "Santa Claus has visited me eighty-nine times!" Remmy's eyes opened wide, and with his mouth gaping he declared, "Wow! You must have a lot of great toys!" "I did," said Mr. Royce, laughing. "Many of them are old now, like me."

"But when toys get old they don't get wrinkled," remarked Remmy.

Mr. Royce chuckled and said, "That's right. Instead they get chipped paint and broken pieces. It's kind of the same thing. The same way toys get used, people's bodies get used. Toys get old because we use them. My body is old and wrinkled because I used it. Do you have an old toy that doesn't work well anymore?"

"Yeah, a couple of them," replied Remmy. "Well, that's the way my body is now. Do you remember having fun playing with those toys?" "Yeah! My best friend, Ronnie, would come over, and we would play with them a lot," Remmy said excitedly.

"So you have happy memories playing with your old toys, even though they don't work too well anymore?" "I sure do, but I like my new ones, too." "What if you never played with your old toys?" asked Mr. Royce. "They might still be like new, but you wouldn't have fun memories of playing with them, right?"

"I guess you're right." "Which would you rather have, the good times playing with your friend or your old toys looking like new?" Without hesitation Remmy exclaimed, "The fun with my friend! We laughed a lot."

"That's the same way I feel about my body," explained Mr. Royce. "I had fun in my life and did a lot of exciting things. If I wanted to protect my body and try to keep it looking like new, I would have missed out on some great times. The same thing goes for you and your toys. If you leave all your toys in the box and never play with them, they'll never get old and break, but you'll never have any fun with them either. Have you ever skinned your knee?"

"Yeah, look!" Remmy rolled his pants leg up over his right knee, proudly displaying a wound from the playground. "That's okay," said Mr. Royce. "You're using your body and having fun. I had a lot of bumps and bruises in my life. I usually got them while I was doing something I liked. It was worth getting a bump on the knee. The same way using a toy until it breaks is okay, because you enjoyed playing with it. "With a concerned look on his face, Mr. Royce asked, "Am I making sense?"

"I get it," obliged Remmy. "I was having fun when I skinned my knee."
Mr. Royce smiled and continued. "When a baby is born, she's soft and smooth because she's new. But she also hasn't had any fun yet. She doesn't have any memories of playing with her friends either. But as she grows, she'll have fun, make memories with her friends, and, sure enough, skin her knee. When she gets old, like me, she'll have wrinkles, too.

"So now do you know why I have all these wrinkles?" "Yeah!" said Remmy. "You're all used up!" Laughing boisterously, Mr. Royce confessed, "Yes, that's a big part of it. I've also got wrinkles because I've lived a long time and had a lot of fun. I like to think of each wrinkle as a great memory."

"You must be really happy," declared Remmy. With a nostalgic look on his face,
Mr. Royce responded, "I certainly am, son. I certainly am."

As Ms. Valentine called for the students to say their goodbyes, Mr. Royce reached out his wrinkled hand to say farewell, but Remmy didn't shake it. Instead he gave Mr. Royce an affectionate hug and ran off to join his classmates. A flurry of distant memories flashed through Mr. Royce's mind, and his eyes prickled with tears. He was delighted with the new memory he and Remmy had just created. He hoped it would be one Remmy would think of someday, many years from then, when he had wrinkles, too.

--Inspired by Anita Hart
Inspiring Real Life Stories from [ http://www.beliefnet.com ]

The man who views the world at fifty the same as he did at twenty
has wasted thirty years of his life.
-- Muhammad Ali

To be able to look back upon one's past life with satisfaction is to live twice.
-- Marcus Valerius Martial